Sunday July 30th, I attended the Mindfulness retreat at My Detox Lounge in Tracy, Ca. I really had a good time, very informative. I had the pleasure in meeting the guest speakers. Beverly, the energy healer, Sabrina the Colon Hydrotherapist, Juanita, the intuitive and Life Coach, Ram 1 and Ram 2, The Art of Living instructors for The Happiness Program, Cynthia Shay, the doTerra Wellness Advocate Leader, and Catherine, the owner of My Detox Lounge who plays many rolls and wears many hats, and who has many gifts. The guest speakers explained some helpful techniques/tips on meditation, breathing exercises, and how to use your high energy to spread love. We also had the privilege in making our own essential oil roller ball using crystals to assist with one of our Chakras.
The atmosphere was inviting, calming, and gratifying. The only expectation I had was to learn and leave feeling that I was able to apply those tools to my life to help become a better me and a better mother. I can honestly say I receive just that and a whole lot more. As Beverly stated, “I have a high energy hangover”.
What stood out to me, as well as given me confirmation that what I’ve been doing is an endorsement that it’s ok for me to walk away from any relationships that serves me no damn good. That can mean anybody from friends, to family, to coworkers, anybody. So yes! if I say or have said, Fuck you and deleted your number from my phone and deleted you from all of my social media accts, that only means that I am removing your energy from mine because my focus is to make sure that I’m protecting my energy and my mental health. In the words of Dustin Ross (from The Friend Zone), who in the HELL wants a musty brain.
To have that confirmation felt so good. It doesn’t mean that I’m holding a grudge or being what others may call it, a Bitch. I can be that, but why? What good does that do for me? It just means that I’m putting myself first. Am I being selfish? Yes! I am. Finally! (as I say this to myself with a big smile). I can finally be me and not feel bad.
I mentioned that the Mindfulness retreat was inviting because I was greeted as soon as I walked in. Everyone who attended this event was greeted with such kindness. I immediately felt good when I walked in. No guards up, until I was picked from Beverly to stand in front of everyone. Thank you to my big mouth. I also experience calmness. I wasn’t anxious. The speakers didn’t give the impression that they were rushing. They all stayed at a good and steady paste. Each speaker provided valuable information and kept our attention on them. My favorite informative speaker was Sabrina, she broke down the colonic Hydrotherapy in simple terms. She explained the benefits and how it’s done. This is something that I am defiantly going to do. Mrs. Juanita, the life coach and Institutive Reader was funny and very firm. As she says, she is no bullshitting type of person. Something my mom would say and has said. But I suggest that everyone take the time out and experience a few minutes with Juanita. I left feeling mentally cleansed, motivated, and powerful. I left knowing that I deserve to be treated like a human, with respect and if I don’t get that I’m ok with people thinking I’m a bitch. I know me and I have boundaries.
I know whatever is being thrown at me, I'm ready to deal with it. I don't have everything figure out, but I love the fact that I have the tools to be myself and to be around people who except me, for me. Not just the funny me.
My Raaw Thoughts
Hands down, one of the best books I’ve read in my 35 years of living. I do have to admit when I first herd Charlamagne Tha God was writing a book, I really thought it was going to be on some dumb shit. I never really paid attention when he spoke about it. Then, when I heard the title. I damn sure wasn’t even interested in reading the book. I thought to myself, Black Privilege! Are you kidding me! There’s no such thing. On charlamagne’s podcast The Brilliant Idiots, he was talking about it and for some reason I zoned out. I totally judged the book. Never gave it a chance.
One slow day at work, I decided to use my friend Google, whose open 24 hours, 7 days a week. Gotta love the internet. I searched Charlamagne’s book and read the introduction. Maaaaaan I was wrong! I was stuck reading it. My eyes were so glued to my computer screen that I never checked my phone for any social media notifications, text messages, or emails. I loved what I was reading.
“Never stunt your own growth by dismissing something just because it doesn’t feel familiar”. Quoted by Charlamagne tha God.
The reason why I love this book so much is the honesty, which Charlamagne speaks about. I connected very well with this book because for years I’ve been asking myself, why am I always having issues with people when speaking my mind, especially at work. I carefully examine myself and talk to my “good” friends and family and they all say the same thing. Cause you keep it too real. Even my husband says the same thing. His words, “you don’t beat behind the bush”. My father even told me (in my 20’s) I was going to lose many relationships with friends and family memebers because I keep it too real and he ask for me to never to change that. I guess you can say, (quoted by charlamagne) “speak my truth” in my charlamagne’s voice.
I don’t want to be a spoiler alert, but there’s so much good stuff in the book. I totally laughed a lot and I learned a lot as well. To my surprise, I learned a lot about Charlamagne and I wasn’t excepting that, I also learned a lot about myself, which I’ll write about in a different post. Charlamagne is truly a genuine good guy and he’s a go getter. His journey, life story is great and lots of lessons learned. Yes he can be an ass hole, but that’s only because some people are consumed with fakeness. People don’t except for someone to stand their ground and speak their truth.
I wish I had this type of book when I was starting college.
It’s very ware to come across someone who will tell you to your face how they feel about you. I mean it’s refreshing, but at the same time I would be pissed off for a little bit if someone came to me and said, you’re getting fat, what you gonna do about that? In all honesty, I have gained A LOT of weight in an unhealthy way and I do need to make better and smart choices about my eating habits. I am all about communication and talking things through, even if we disagree, very much like Charlamagne and Andrew Schultz (who I really can’t stand). In this book THERE IS NO bullshitting, straight up you get the real deal from the sources mouth.
Ross Store: California
These shoes are comfortable and have lots of room. Great for people with fat feet or wide feet.
The paint I used for both furniture pieces is the Lark + Kensington Semi-Gloss in white. Never let paint go to waste.
Before you start painting please sand down your item either by hand or with an electric sander. The above furniture item/picture, I sand it down by hand with a high (120) level sandpaper.
Please choose the correct number of sand paper. The higher the number of grits, the finer it is. The lower the number of grits level, the coarser it is. For an example, you need coarse sandpaper for smoothing surfaces and removing imperfections. For fine/less coarse sandpaper, you may use that to smooth the item to just clean it up a little.
The furniture item/picture below, I did not sand it down. Therefore, I had to use 3-4 coats to get the smooth look and to fill in any paint seperations.
Please read this amazing post by clicking on the link below
The notion of self-acceptance seemed quite foreign, albeit not completely impossible to me when I was in my early years of elementary school. Being in an environment where nearly all students critiqued and judged one another, to the point where outright bullying was a norm, was undoubtedly the foundation of my lacking self-love. This is interesting, because to some degree, I did accept the way that it was: that this was the way that things were, that at eight or nine years old, I was happier dressing comfortably than in tighter and purposely provocative clothing, or that being kinder to people felt better to me than being cruel. But although I accepted that this was the way that I was and that I wouldn’t change myself for other people, I sometimes hated myself because of it.
Now take this and combine it with the regular wear and tear of growing up from child, to pre-adolescent, to teenager, all the way into the observant and (hopefully) relatively well-rounded twenty-something I am today. Throughout this journey, there have been all of the typical ups and downs, plus a few additional trials and triumphs added here and there; there were many times where I almost came to accept that I would never accept my life for all that it was, as-is. Despite a slight bravado of confidence in my secondary and later post-secondary education, I felt absolutely terrified about my future. Despite repeating time and time again to people that I had a flawless plan for what I wanted to achieve and how I would obtain it, I was positively clueless at so many times. Despite almost always plastering a smile across my face, I often felt very lost in the life that I was living. In all honesty, I still feel these things more often than I should in the present day.
There are still days when I sense that impeding weight of being "less than" creep up on me, threatening to make me feel like all of my personal successes and accomplishments are inadequate in the grand scheme of things. I often feel that I am a minute detail, a small speck in the greater picture. I find it best to attempt stepping back and re-evaluating everything for as it truly is (which I am very often able to do, thankfully), but there are still times when I cannot help but wonder, Is it possible for me to have done more in less time? Should I be far more ahead than I currently am? Am I good enough right now?
Though in hindsight, when you’re in a clear state of mind where everything is going well and you are free from that self-doubt, you can confidently declare, "I’m doing amazing! I can do anything!", this is something we must practice for those days when we do not feel so enthusiastic.
Remember that you are 100% on track, even when it might seem like you are not. I firmly believe that we are always in the right place at the right time and moving forward at a pace that is best for us in a given situation. Nothing we do or experience is a mistake; we must take the bad with the good and consider everything a learning experience that we can grow from, not allow ourselves to be hindered by.
Sending love to everyone today and always.
EMILY FATA – www.EmulatingEmily.com
Instagram:http://www.instagram.com/emilyfata AND http://www.instagram.com/wanderousaffair
Dear Past Me,
All I care about is how I look or how I appear to other people, turns out people want me to change. They don't like me for who I am and I get made to feel pretty shitty.
But who knew a couple of years from today I'd be accepting myself for my quirks. I'm weird? so what?! I may not be perfect but that's who I am.
I don't have perfect legs and I sure as hell don't have perfect blonde hair. But somehow I'm me.
At the age of twenty you'll look in the mirror and feel happy, forgetting everything that anyone has ever said to you. You may not have the perfect figure, or have that body guys think is to die for but you'll be happy, that's what matters. You'll accept yourself for who you are.
In ten years you'll regret ever doubting yourself. You'll have amazing friends who are just as weird as you, even sharing the same quirks! Weird right?!
Just remember each time you doubt yourself, read this letter and remember you are beautiful inside and out and not you or anyone else can stand in your way.
Lots of love, past me xx
Growing up I had a good childhood, I grew with both parents in the household, attend great schools, lived in a nice neighborhood, always had food and clothing. Both parents always worked. My mother worked at the same job for over 40 years and my father worked many jobs. He could always find a job rather its temporary or permanent. I remember one day I came home from and my dad was home. My dad told me that he had quit his job because his manager disrespected him. Therefore, my dad gave him the BUSINESS and quit and found another job the following week.
You might be thinking, this has nothing to do with Accepting Yourself. But, I needed to provide you with a mini background and it will tie in to my post.
Both parents were very totally different. I mean night and day. But that’s just how me and my husband is. Very different, hot and cold. Both parents were very strong (mentally and physically), outspoken, confident, and accepted themselves.
I learned a lot from my parents, but as I get older I see a lot of their good traits in me. But what I love about my parents is how they treated themselves, how they reacted towards “some” situations, how they handled certain situations, who they hung around with, how they treated themselves with gifts, and how they managed to stay true themselves.
I believe we are or at least I know and can admit that I am my worst critic. I use to talk shit about myself, I am extra hard on myself, and at one point I didn’t treat myself the nicest. I use to have really bad anxiety and anger issues (from keeping things inside and not expressing them) So…..That defiantly added a lot of stress and negative thoughts.
I’ve come a long way, I have more work to do but I have some helpful tips with some fun activities that can help you with accepting yourself, the good, the bad, and the ugly.
Now let me add this important message. Just because I’m more calm and relaxed, I don’t allow people to talk to me in any way, shape or form. Just because I hold/tame my tongue does not mean I am a punk, scared, or a door matt. People often get that confused. And another thing, just because I’m a Christian doesn’t mean I let everything slide.
The topic Self- Acceptance was motivated by an individual who provided me with some great feedback about my Introduction YouTube Channel. I was really grateful, but some words or statement triggered something in my soul, not in a bad way, but it reminded me of somethings that I went through. No matter what there will always be people out in the world that will disapprove or dislike how you look, live, talk, dress, smile, laugh, eat…. Must I go on? I think you get the point.
This is no shade at all.
I can take criticism when its spoken out of love to help me do better, which this is what I believe the feedback was. However, I am who I am and I accept who I am. I curse every now and then.
The reality is that when you ask for advice or opinion of others, it’s up to you to take it. Now mentioning that I should not curse because it can decrease my chances in sponsorship or collaboration, is probably true. However, I will not code switch on my blog or on my channel. Period! If you’re not familiar with code switching, please Google it or if you want me to talk about it. Let me know and I’ll be happy to post it.
I like Cardi B for who she is. She never pretends to be someone else. She went from being a stripper to realty star and now she has appeared on VH1 popular T.V show Being Mary Jane. Talking about breaking barriers and making changes. She is known for being loud and ratchet and being brutally honest in a very vulgar way.
AAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNND, I love it.
Be Yourself: You will never be happy by pretending to be someone else.
Control Yourself: this means your eyes and looks. Sometimes your face can say a lot or if your someone like me who reacts and speaks immediately. Control your tongue. Think first and analysis.
Forgive Yourself: No one is perfect and don’t try to because your setting yourself up for failure.
Love Yourself: We’ve all heard the quote, you can’t love anyone else until you love yourself. That’s true. Just think about it. When you love something, you take good care of it. If you’re having problems with loving yourself try some to of the activities that I’ll list below and you might want to think about talking to a therapist. I do and I think everyone should. It helps.
Do you know who Angela Rye is? Well click at the links below to know who this Sista is. She is amazing, intelligent, smart, and beautiful. You can learn a lot from her.